Are You Asking for Help in Your Toolbox?

As we move into the end of the year, there’s a strong focus on the idea of “New Year’s Resolutions” and “New Year Goals”. 

After all, there’s a widespread idea that the end of the year is a time for change, for improvement, for growth… and all of this throws us into a frenzy — especially when we feel like we’re “running out of time”.

The idea of a “new year, new me” – like there’s a deadline for “change” – can send us into overdrive and put us in a “do, do, do…” mode. Head down, going at all times, taking on all of the things, and never giving ourselves the room to stop.

But what if we flipped the switch? 

What if, by changing our mindset, we instead looked for places where we can receive instead of always giving more?

Asking for help when you need it most isn’t a sign of weakness

There’s a distorted idea that asking for help makes us seem weak or unreliable — and that couldn’t be further from the truth!

Here’s the thing: asking for help isn’t always easy — trust me, I know this first-hand. And the reality is that choosing to speak up when we’re feeling overwhelmed is the best way to highlight and internalize all of the things that we’re worthy of.

Respect, community, confidence, rest; asking for help allows us to make a long list of all the things we know that we deserve in life — and it also opens us up for opportunities to receive them.

But when we refuse to ask others for support, we’re basically putting a cap on our worth. 

When we choose to take things on alone, we’re basically telling others that we don’t consider ourselves “worthy enough” of getting their help — and that often ends up affecting the way we see ourselves and the different ways that our community sees and interacts with us, too.

However, when we’re open to receiving someone’s help… we’re flat-out telling them (and ourselves) that we know we are worthy of receiving it. 

Our actions and words become a direct representation of how we view ourselves.

But that’s easier said than done, right? Because asking for help, and looking to others for support, means letting go of control, taking a step back, and allowing others to take the lead.

And even though that sense of “letting go” can be incredibly scary and overwhelming… now’s the perfect opportunity to embrace it, and realize that it doesn’t have to be.

Where can you ask for help in 2023?

As you start setting your goals for next year, make sure to ask yourself the following question: “Where can I ask for help in 2023?”.

Maybe you need additional support with your business, or maybe you need help outside of what you do for work to remove some of the load in your day-to-day personal life.

Whatever the case, it’s important to recognize these instances and ask for what you need — which is also what you deserve. 

After all, when you are not comfortable asking for what you need in your personal life, it’s possible that you’re also blocking your own ability to receive abundance in your business too!

Personally, this year has been a year of acceptance and reflection for me where I had many instances where I asked for help (as uncomfortable as it was for me to do so). 

In 2022, I decided to actively start acknowledging the places where I needed to be more open to receiving instead of simply taking things (or rejecting them) as a reflex.

What’s the difference between the two? Well, when we reflexively take help, we’re not truly aware of the support we’re getting, how it reached us, or how it’s benefiting us. On the other hand, when we receive help, we’re consciously accepting support, showing gratitude, and internalizing  its (and our!) worth.

One instance in particular springs to mind of a very special moment this year when I opened myself up to receiving help from someone.

A close friend offered a safe space while I was going through a personal transition, and my first reaction was to say “no, thank you” because I was afraid of being a burden. It wasn’t until later that I decided to take her up on her offer — even though I felt scared to bring it up again. 

Today, I can confidently say that taking them up on their offer was the best decision I could have made — especially because it meant I was putting myself first. 

Accepting help felt nice, it felt comfortable, it made me feel supported — and it also allowed me to work through everything that was happening at my own pace, stress-free, and without the clutter of the situation hanging above my head.

Accepting this help also opened up more opportunities to receive support!

The universe sent many more opportunities my way that flowed in with ease. Thankfully, I was ready and willing to receive them, too.

Funnily enough, asking for help actually made me feel more empowered than I did when I refused to accept the support of people around me. Why? Because it helped me remove myself and my attachment from the outcome, and it pushed me in the right direction to align myself and my mindset to receive more.

Opening yourself up to the support you deserve

With all of this in mind, my invitation to you today is as follows:
Next time if your habitual reaction is to immediately say “no” when someone offers help — or to say “no” to the voice inside your head when you consider asking for help — take a moment to pause… and start veering towards saying more “YES!”.

Yes to receiving help, yes to asking for help, yes to embracing help!

And if you’re having trouble visualizing this, or if you feel uncomfortable at the thought of accepting support, here are three journaling prompts that can help you be more open to receiving:

→ What are some ways I have denied help or support in the past?

→ How would I prefer to receive help or support?

→ How does my future self respond to asking for or receiving this support?

Hopefully, taking a closer look at your answers — sitting with them, understanding them, and taking a closer look at where they stem from — can help transform your behavior around your openness to receive what you desire and deserve.

And, want to know the best part? You don’t have to do it alone.

I’d love to work with you to create the momentum you need to truly embrace support instead of continuing to avoid it. 

Click here to book a discovery call with me, and let’s uncover the different ways that we can help you move forward toward a more receptive, accepting you.